I was with my ex for over a 2years, I lived with him had pets with him our parents know and when you're Gujarati we tell our parents about a boy if you want to get married. I lied to this guy before going out with him saying I didn't sleep with someone but I did 1month into the relationship I told him I lied he forgave me. i told him about my past and he accepted them all. I spent the whole summer holiday with him like all the time it was perfect, I fell in love like I had never done before. We came to back to uni and literally lived with each other, i cooked for him cleaned for him, everything you name it i did. I stayed awake all night to get him take out breakfast, brought the grocery shopping, wash the clothes, he didn't lift a finger, sort out letters. But, he treated me like a princess, and I did those thing out of love and I like doing it. Then at the xmas holidays he was still angry about the lie I told him cause the guy i lied about to him was making fun of me, and my ex compared me to this girl who cheated on her boyfriend and told me I was worse then her. It broke my heart and ever since then I never felt good enough. I would always feel insecure when I saw the girl. I asked him when he was calm if he meant it and he said he did. I got so upset, but after wards he told me it was out of anger. But, I couldn't get it out of my head. He had already brought me a rabbit which was so sweet I saw it online and he brought it for me as a surprise. But it would pee in the room on the bed which I felt was bad and cause problems cause the place werent clean I used to clean around but the place werent properly clean. We had arguments but they would blow over like how normal couples do. I was living in halls with my friends but never saw them and we stopped talking cause I was always with him, i refused to pay bills and he spoke to them saying that I wont be paying it cause I don't use the water etc, so I lose my friends. But, we decided to move in together, I put the place on my name and we moved in. The day we moved in was bad, we didn't like the place because we thought it had a bad vibe. We had a rabbit and it would pee on the bed pillows and carpet so the place was never 100% clean. We use to go Temple together too. I even got his names tattoo on my back. But, I still was scared I werent good enough for him, which frustrated me so much which made me angry and I would get moody cause I wanted to feel I was, he did make me feel special but I was scared. I meet his family and went to his house, I loved them. He also met my mum, he didn't meet my dad cause we had to finish uni first. I even I was going to marry him after uni has finished then our parents would meet each other. We used each others cards my money was his and his was mine. I would get his stuff ready for him to have a shower i had the life. But, 3months before breaking up we had really bad arguements, arguments that would lead to him hitting me. I got a bad attitude and i was really bad. 3 times I shouted at him when he was in bed crying and I wouldnt shut up. I told him to move out 4times but stopped him. And the last time I kicked him out he never came back. It was 6am he got the car he waited for me to stop him, i packed his things told him i'll pay for the flat but when i went to stop him hed gone. I called him shouting at him saying you left me, you don't care. I was mean something I had never been. When he got to his friends he said hed give me a chance and we'd work it out. Next day he said he'd had enough and dumped me over the email. I got so weak I had to call an ambulance. I tried everything to get him back, but he said he hates me that i treated him like that and he cant get back with me. I had to get rid of the flat, my parents picked me up and I had to re home the rabbits. He said horrible things to my aunt about me, saying I used his parents money to shop, I was nasty we tried to get him to pay for the flat because we decided to get it together and I had to put it on my name cause he didnt have a guarantor. My aunt called his mum they said no, he left me in finacial mess, I had to pack the rest of his thing and drop them to his friends I still have some which he's going to collect from me soon, I sent him cards apologized cause I acted like that cause I was scared to lose him cause I never felt good enough. But, he don't want to know he's blocked my facebook, mobile number and I'm living near him in a week for last yr of uni. He's threaten me saying to keep out of his way otherwise he'll tel everyone how i acted and I slept with that guy. I just want him back how can I win him back. Cause I'm not a bad person I said I won't contact him because I want him to be happy and I'll let him go, but I did that so he would come back. Every guy I've broke up with has come back. How can I win his heart again because when I was me he was happy. I just changed i
i just want a chance. I blame myself for him hitting me it was my fault for being such a b***h. I felt I weren't good enough for him, which made me be someone I weren't. Do you think there is anything I can do to get him back. I'm going to see him all the time when uni starts and I'm scared. I just want a chance. Cause when things were good they were good. I was supposed to be marrying him. He say's he's hurt cause i really hurt him a lot i made him have cold sweats and wouldn't stop shouting. But, he hates me and don't ever want to see me. What should I do? I cannot move on I'm not normally this weak.
I've really tried to get over him I've done everything. I can't do it. I was in a relationship for 5years which I got over quicker, and defo didn't feel this pain I'm going threw. It's so hard, everything reminds me of him and make me get anxiety. I even packed the rest of his things up and gave it to his friend cause he wasnt able to pick it up. I have some of his stuff left which he'll pick up well he says his friend will cause he never wants to see me. He didn't care he left me and my family in this financial mess which he don't know we managed to get out of, he was treating me to keep me away. Am I able to win his heart, I'm hoping when he sees me again his feeling will come back from hate to love. But, I don't know any tips?
I keep adding things lol sorry. The perfect guy I wanted the character everything is him. He was the guy I looked for my whole life and gave up then I found him.
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