i hate to be agitated, angry , short with people or have an angry outburst , i work on it fully to control it, im not a fighter at all and would come unstuck in an actual confrontation unless i had a bloody big sword.
right now my life feels very hectic , i was diagnosed with various personality disorders years ago and i also have very bad anxiety disorders - the aggressive problems ive had comes from years of harassment in my earlier life , and a build up of anger - im now 32.
ive lived alone for 6 years , cooperating with the mental health services trying to make progress on all my problems , ive done very well for years.
ive missed out on all the normal life happenings of building relationships, having a job , or having qualifications and most other things.
even though im a reserved , private aloof person, i get very lonely in my apartment everyday , only my mum for support who gets tired and shouts at me when i go on and whinge obsessively about my situation and anxiety everyday. shes nearly 60 , but im very close to my mam.
recently i had my flat rejuvenated - my bathroom and kitchen , its an improvement from what it was, but still very shoddy , shabby workmanship. - - - - - theres a crack in my new bath , just under an inch long located at the edge of one of the metal handles of the bath ------- ive made numerous complaints about the building company's overall unprofessional attitude and shoddy workmanship and to my housing council association.
more recently , ive noticed, when i fill my bath up with water, the plug still in, after about an hour , the water level drops , as if the plug is slowly letting out water ---- i left it over night to test it ----- and the water has gone right down from what i filled it to..
this is really stressing me out as i dont know what to do, my housing association and building company's attitude has been very crap, taking all their time to come out and fix jobs they didn't do properly.
im wondering what im going to do about my new bath now, because the work is supposedly finished now, bath tiles put up etc -- and even though its a council flat and i dont own my own home - its still fckng terrible.
all together i live on disability, dont get much money , own very few material possessions , dont have carpets on my floor - i only have the basics , ie : a bed , a small tv , a land-line phone , an old computer , a playstation 2 and thats it virtually.
over all this shoddy rejuvenating work over a 8 week period , idiotic workers here early every morning was a very traumatic experience for me, really did try my patience.
now there's these issues with my new bath , and wondering what i can do about it , should i demand a new bath etc, or demand they repair this one etc ---its really causing me bad anxiety and depressing me.
can anyone give any words of encouragement or advice ?
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